What has 20 years of marriage taught me?

  

My parents married 50 years ago in December 1971. I married 20 years ago in December 2001. In his speech at my younger sister's wedding in 2011, my father advised that the most important thing in a marriage is trust. Today when I look back at wedding photos taken when I was much younger, slimmer and had more hair, I am reminded to treasure the small moments in life and to count my blessings. We easily lose ourselves in everyday problems and focus on what we don't have, that we forget what's most important to us. 

Happy 20th anniversary to my beloved wife, Michelle Fu Yee Vun.  

When do you withhold information?

To run an organisation effectively, communication and transparency are important. However when you head a large organisation with many people of different levels and backgrounds, communication and transparency may not be that straight-forward. Do you withhold some information because some of your staff would not be able to handle it or appreciate it? If so, what would you withhold? Do you downplay bad news?  

Merry Christmas

 

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! May your 2022 be a year of abundance and joy.

https://www.hiewchoksien.com/card2021dionysus

How do you protect your competitive advantage?

 

I once had a discussion with a friend about why some people tend to be protective and defensive about their knowledge and contacts, while others are willing to share and give. Some supervisors are unwilling to teach their subordinates, for fear that these subordinates will overtake them. Some people guard their client lists like national secrets, fearing others will steal their clients from them. Others happily recommend a client to a competitor who can do a better job at what the client currently needs. They share good advice to help others improve, without worrying about losing their own competitive edge. 

The difference is not due the former lacking in resources or struggling to survive. Those who are generous are not necessarily people who are rich and have a great surplus. What makes the difference is the abundance mindset. Some people are willing to share and give because they believe there is plenty to go around and there is no need to hoard. It is these people who eventually gain more and more, through the trust, friendships and synergies they create. Thank you, Danny Ng, for this insight you shared with me. 

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How to attract clients?

 

Help without discrimination. 

When we play the role of salesman for our businesses, we train our "profit sensors". We get better at detecting whether a person is a potential client. We tend to be more willing to listen to, to spend time with, and to help the high potential clients. We minimise entertaining low potential clients. 

This can become a problem when people start to feel: (1) you are spending time with them only because you expect business from them, and (2) you are impatient with them because you don't think they'll buy from you. 

Instead, try to help people when you can, potential client or not. When you always try to create value for others, both the people whom you think are potential clients and people whom you think aren't will reward you will business and business referrals, sooner or later. 

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Be childish

One common weakness in established organisations is they lose the inquisitiveness of the child. They have been successful. They have grown their businesses. They have it all sorted out. They no longer challenge assumptions or ask why. Or why not. They become unable, or unwilling, to learn. When an organisation fails to learn, it will eventually become irrelevant.

This and other tips in my book Every Employee an Entrepreneur:

• Shopee Malaysia
• Lazada Malaysia
• Google Playstore e-book
• Amazon
• Amazon Kindle e-book

Listen to the message, not the messenger

 

At work and in life, we sometimes come across people who just rub us the wrong way. Some are manipulative, some are derisive, some lack respect for other people's time and profession. We instinctively tune out and want to stay away from these people. However we must remember to evaluate the messages fairly and not reject them because of how they are delivered. The most annoying people may speak some truth, and we can get value from that. Don't let emotions and ego stop you from learning and being open-minded. When we look closely, we can find lessons to be learnt. 

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Tips in interviewing people - open-ended questions

 

Open-ended questions are a great way to know more about the candidate. Let her describe a challenging time she experienced and how she overcame it. Let her talk about a hobby she is passionate about, or a movement she supports. Open questions will lead you to ask more questions, which are deeper, and some of which you may not have thought of beforehand. 

When we interview a candidate, we are essentially only trying to answer two questions, (1) can this person do the job? (2) can I work with this person? Open questions help with getting to know the candidate as a person. 

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Anita (the movie)

 

The movie Anita is a biopic of iconic Hong Kong superstar Anita Mui who passed away in 2003 at age 40. I used to listen to many of her songs when I was young. I watched the movie at the cinema the weekend it was released in Malaysia. This was the first time I went to a cinema since the pandemic started. 

The movie covers many themes, from Anita's relationship with her sister to her commitment to her craft and her loyalty to her friends. One particular message which stayed with me is how a veteran in an industry should always mentor and help those who are new. Pass on what you have learned to the next generation, so that they will fare better and the industry / community / society as a whole will become better. Truly great people are noble and selfless, and wish the best for others. They appreciate what they have gained, and are always ready to give back. 

How to sell

When trying to make a sale, don't aim to make this sale.

Instead aim to win the next sale. Sell a product or service that your buyer actually needs and benefits from. Do such a good job that they will remember you and want to buy from you again, or they will recommend others to you. This is the mindset we should have when we sell. Put your customer's welfare in the forefront.

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