Treat children like adults, treat adults like children

 

That's what you have to do if you want to work with people effectively. 

We fail to connect with children because we often dismiss their ideas. We belittle them. We instruct them. They may follow our commands grudgingly, but they are probably not convinced in their hearts. When you take children seriously, respect them like adults and reason with them as peers, they listen and they will be motivated to do their parts. 

We fail to connect with fellow adults because we assume they are always sensible and mature, that they understand us, and that they think like we do. Sometimes we have to spend some time to coax them, ask how they are doing, and care about how they feel. It's not hard to do when we don't take them for granted. We are just human, and we all have a child inside. 

Best marriage advice

Have two blankets! 

This is the most unromantic piece advice I have ever heard of, but it is also one of the most useful. If you want healthy and lasting relationships, you have to be practical. If you have friends or relatives getting married soon, please advise them to get two blankets. If you are married, I do hope you already have two blankets. 

continuous learning

What is the best way to make sure your team is learning and growing?

NLP is Defence Against the Dark Arts

There are many people selling NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) training. According to Wikipedia, it is already disproven and it is a pseudoscience. Since there are still people practising it, then it must be because the techniques do work, even if they work not because of the original scientific basis as claimed by the inventors. 

NLP can be used to manipulate others, even yourself. It is a tool. Whether it is used for good or evil depends on the person who wields the tool. In the Harry Potter world, Hogwarts School teaches Defence Against the Dark Arts. It's basically teaching high school kids to fight. It is not wrong to learn the tool. Just think about how and why you use it. 

Effective Communication

The biggest misconception about effective communication is that communication is about knowing what to say and how to express yourself. I argue that communication is about listening. If you can't empathise with your counterpart and can't understand his or her priorities and pain points, it will be a struggle to let him or her understand your perspective. 

This and other tips in my book Every Employee an Entrepreneur, available at: 

Shopee Malaysia

Lazada Malaysia

Google Playstore e-book

Amazon

Amazon Kindle e-book 

Marketing Tricks #6 Call To Action

The Call To Action is a common technique among marketeers. Emails you receive have a large, attractive button that says "Get Free Credit". Apps you browse show prominent links saying "Download for Free". Webpages have "Contact Us", "Free Consultation" or "Create a Free Account" buttons appearing conveniently after videos or passages wow you with benefits of the products. The Call To Action is simple and direct, and leads you to do something that feels natural and attractive. 

What to do with this information: 

When you are a buyer, recognise these tricks and don't let them affect you making the right decision. Don't hate marketers. It is their job to help sellers connect to their target audience. As a buyer it is your responsibility to understand the product and whether it fits you. 

When you are a seller, this is a trick you can use. No matter how well you market, you must still have a good product if you want to stay in business. Do right by your customers. 

Just make them happy?

Having a high performance team is not about "making your staff happy"

It's not about the free lunches, flexi-time, hip office or the fun team-building activities. It's not even about the bonuses or the increments. It's about people believing in the value of their work, taking pride in their work and being supported to do their best. When your team is high-performing, THEN they will be happy. 

Why is he telling me that?

Do not only look at the information being presented. Look at the motive behind the person sharing the information too. Is he sharing out of kindness? Does he have an agenda? Is he just enthusiastic about the topic? 

You don't need to be adamantly sceptical. Just keep in mind this additional perspective. It will help you understand the full picture. 

what Gandhi said

 

Each night, when I go to sleep, I die. And the next morning, when I wake up, I am reborn. - Mahatma Gandhi

How do you interpret this? 

Live every day to the fullest. You know not which day will be the last. 

Every day is a new day with new hope. It is a matter of what you make of it. 

There is no tomorrow. There is no yesterday. There is only now. What do you want to do now? 

Sorry teacher I have forgotten how to do my maths because I slept too hard last night.