Don't sell solutions. Solve problems.

 

Recently I took up an unusual job. Normally clients ask me to do leadership training. This particular client enquiry came in just like any other enquiry. The client shared their requirements in writing. I went into a detailed online discussion with the training requestor. They shared their pain points. What surprised me was when I submitted my proposal, they told me that wasn't what they wanted. Despite all those discussions. So I had to dig deeper, with the right persons, to figure out what exactly the problem they wanted me to solve was. It wasn't about what content I had or could deliver. It was about whether I was the right person to help solve their problem. Eventually I took the job because I was able to work out what problem they needed solved, and I could do it for them. The client did not want training. They wanted their leaders to reconnect, and newly onboarded leaders to bond with existing leaders, so that as a leadership team they could work together effectively and execute their strategic plan. That was why the room was arranged as a circle of chairs. That was also why the first thing I told them on "training" day was - "We are not here for training. We are here to play!"

Do you know how to give instructions?

 

If you struggle to get your staff to do things right, perhaps one aspect to examine is simply how you give instructions to them. https://www.simplifypeople.com/articles/iyosa-a-skill-in-giving-instructions

How do you define leadership?

 

People know how to complain about the failings of a leader, but they don't always know how to define what a good leader should be like. When asked to define good leadership, people have different opinions. Some say leadership is decision-making. Some say it is about having a vision. Some say it is leading by example - do what you want others to do. One thing most people can agree on is a leader needs to get things done. They help the organisation achieve results. People coming together to form an organisation always creates difficulties, because we are human. A good leader gets these humans to work together to achieve something they can't achieve by themselves. What else do you think a good leader should do?

Why is leadership called a soft skill?

 

Topics like leadership, management, sales, communication and public speaking all get lumped under "soft skills". Many people think of "soft skills" as something intangible and thus less valuable. The truth is, leadership is called "soft" because it is not easily measured. Sometimes people ask me, if I attend your leadership course, what result can I expect to get out of it. Leadership is not like learning Powerpoint. You don't see results after one or two days. Leadership is hard. It takes time, commitment  and awareness to practise good leadership. Attending a two-day leadership training doesn't give you results. Practising good leadership principles you learn gives you results. 

Why do many leaders reject empathic leadership?

 "My employees are grown-ups and they should not need to be taken care of like babies."

"We are here to get work done, not sit around all day talking about feelings."

"I have enough problems on my plate. I cannot be going around taking on everyone's problems as well." We know that employees are motivated and they perform when they feel appreciated and supported. One reason seasoned leaders reject empathic leadership is they themselves are burnt out. Here's one tip for practising empathic leadership. It is not only about feeling for and crying with others. It is also about the drive to make things better for them. Spend less time on feeling. Spend more time on doing. Do everything you can, but don't expect yourself to do more. Leaders who practise empathy sometimes still blame themselves despite having done everything in their power. We have to take care of ourselves too in order to be able to better care for others.